The social life of women and gentlemen living in the mid-19th century was surprisingly diverse and at times restrictive by modern standards. Society held the sway and deemed what was appropriate, proper and acceptable entertainment. When presented with social opportunities to mix with family, friends and the opposite gender, people were afforded both a social interaction, as well as an occasion for unmarried women to interact with unmarried gentlemen. Social amusements could be affected by the season of the year. Summer weather allowed for outside enjoyments such as picnics, horseback riding, carriage drives, archery, shooting, bird watching, walking and lawn sports. Winter activities embraced apple bees, sleigh rides, ice skating, theatricals, dancing parties, musical soirees and parlour activities.
No matter the season, in the mid-19th century when adults, children and families met together for amusement, they often created their own entertainments. Games and theatricals were passed down through generations, and played and replayed over the years. The games “lived in the memories of successive generations, and have been handed down by tradition time out of mind.” But the never satisfied Victorian always desired to have the “latest” even in regard to social or home amusements.
Two of the best known mid-1800s social amusement books are The Book of Parlour Games (1853) and The Sociable (1858). Both of the books’ prefaces state that they contain the latest and newest of home amusements including those that “are entirely new to us,” and the recreations described “are entirely new.” In The Sociable the authors noted that they have “striven to make this volume a hand-book of interesting and agreeable amusement for family circles, for schools, for pic-nic (sic)parties, for social clubs, and, in short, for all occasions where diversion is appropriate…” The informal social atmosphere in which most games were played allowed the participants a rare opportunity for laughter, flirting, showing one’s creativity and wit, and intermingling freely with opposite gender.
Parlor games and home amusements were more than not, easily instructed and required of the hostess/host and the participants very few props in order to play (one exception might be the Tableaux Vivant.) Most of the games, although creating an opportunity for true competition, did not keep a numerical score to select the winner. They were merely games to be played for pleasure. The Sociable noted that in their selection of games for their book, they took the greatest care to “exclude everything that might possibly be objected by the most rigidly fastidious.” In regard to the ballroom, numerous dance manuals offered instructions on games suitable to be played during intermissions. These dancing games or parlor cotillion games were called the “German.” Instructions for various home amusements were given in the two previously named exhaustive volumes as well as in the monthly subscription periodicals such Godey’s Lady’s Book, Peterson’s Magazine, and Arthur’s Lady’s Home Magazine.
In comparing various amusement books and monthly periodical offerings, there appears a standard of division in the categorizing of the various ‘games.’ Most noted are the descriptions and divisions of: Games of Action or Motion, Games of Memory, Games of Mystification or Tease, Games of Gallantry, Games of Wit or Learning, Puzzles, Living Portraits or Tableaux Vivants , Rebuses, Charades or Acting Proverbs, Enigmas and of course, Games which simply require Attention.
Games of Motion require the use of bodily movement to execute the game, be it the piling of one’s hands or the changing of chairs. Games of Memory compel the players to remember a series of descriptive terms or the consecutive addition of a phrase to the game’s key phrase. Games of Mystification intend to tease or to force the player who is ‘it’ to have to discover the trick that is causing the game to play itself out (i.e., not using the name of a food that contains the letter ‘o.’) Games of Gallantry often have themes of love or the beauty of one’s lover. Games of Wit are usually short silly games whereby one trues to make his/her opponent laugh or perform an act which is not allowed in the game. Puzzles are usually a game utilizing some figure drawn on a piece of paper by which the answer must be discerned to a statement or riddle. Tableaux Vivants is a game whereby the players dress or arrange a scene which recreates a known painting or portrait. The rest of the players are to guess which scene the living portrait is representing. Rebuses are complicated riddles which are given in poetry form and read aloud. Rebuses tend to be difficult to discover the answer or to catch the understanding. Charades are dramatic presentations by which the other players guess what is being dramatized. Unlike present day charades, the mid-19th century charades usually involved three to seven players acting out numerous scenes; each scene within the drama illustrating a syllable of a single word. Enigmas are poetry rhymes which are similar to rebuses; however, these lengthy poems run one to two pages in length. Players listen carefully for a variety of clues leading to the identification of the item, person or event described. Enigmas often have multiple hidden answers instead of a sole answer to be discovered by the players. Games of Attention usually force the players to concentrate on the use of a phrase or signal in order to catch an opposing player in making a mistake.
As with most games, friendly completion was plentiful and winning was the sought goal. Often the game required of those losing a forfeit or penances if they by chance had failed to complete the amusement’s instructions or to offer the correct answer. And it was in the execution of the forfeit that the laughter or flirting was at its prime. A listing of sample forfeits could be found in the books or attached to the instructions for a particular game. More times than not the penance added a slight social embarrassment to the loser; many forfeits insisted on a kiss! Mme. Elisabth F. Bayle-Mouillard in her Complete Manual of Games of Society, offers a defense of the use of the kiss as a forfeit:
“Another consideration in favor of games of society, it must be admitted that for persons leading a sedentary life, and occupied all day in writing and reckoning (the case with most men), a game that demands the same attitude, the same tension of mind, is poor recreation. On the contrary, the varying movement of games of society, their diversity, the gracious and gay ideas that these games inspire, the decorous caresses that they permit-all this combines to give real amusement. These caresses can alarm neither modesty nor prudence, since a kiss in honor given and taken before numerous witnesses is often an act of propriety.”
Often the company as a whole decided the forfeit for the loser or the penance might be drawn randomly from a selection provided by the hostess/host. Forfeits often became a game in and of themselves since they sometimes involved the whole company’s participation. Examples of forfeits include: Hush-a-Bye Baby, the loser must yawn until they can make several others of the company yawn. Kissing the Candlestick in which the person must give a kiss to the person who holds in his hand a lighted candlestick, The Spirit of Contradiction in which the loser must fulfill the contrary commands given by the company, Pouting during which the person condemned to pout says to the person who is the holder of the forfeits whom they wish to kiss. Then all of the opposite gender present themselves in succession to the one who is pouting who proceeds to turn his/her back on each until the one they have named appears and then kisses them “heartily!”
Offered for your next social gathering are three delightful games which instructions are taken as they appear in the original sources. These are sure to delight all who attend and participate!
The Ribbons
“Every person in this game takes a ribbon, ad holds an end of it. The other ends are held in the hand of the leader of the game, and he finds himself consequently in the middle of the circle.
When he cried “Pull,” you must let go; when he cries, “Let go,” you must pull.
It is astonishing how many forfeits can be got by this simple game.”
Catch the Ring
“In order to pay this capital game, the chairs are placed in a circle, just so far apart, that each person sitting can easily reach the hand of another on either side of him. One person stands in the middle of the circle. A piece of string with a wedding, or a larger ring of brass, upon it, is then tied, of a sufficient length to reach all round the circle, so that each person may catch hold of it. The players are then to slide the ring along the string, passing it from one to the other, and the game is, for the person who stands in the center to try to catch the ring. When he catches it, the person with whom he finds it is to go out into the centre.
Forfeits may be added to this game, if preferred, each person caught with the ring paying forfeit.”
Compliments
“If there are both ladies and gentlemen present a circle should be formed by seating them alternately. When this done one of the party, a lady, says, I should like to be such or such an animal (insect or piece of furniture), and then demands of the person to the left hand what he can make of so strange a choice. In reply the person addressed must try to find some resemblance between the thing named and the lady, which would be complimentary to her. After doing this the gentleman in his turn says what he should like to be, and the one on his left hand must trace some complimentary resemblance between them, and then the lady on his left proceeds in the same manner, until the circle is complete. The more repulsive and unpleasant the animal or object selected, the more difficult will it seem to find a compliment. Suppose, for instance, a lady should say, “I should like to be a snake, what do you make of so strange a choice?”
The gentleman on her left might say, “Because you possess the art of charming.” He in turn could say, “I should like to be a book-case, what do you make of so strange a choice?” The lady on his left may be supposed to reply, “Because you are handsomely made, and contain much valuable information.”
SELECTED BIBLIOGRAPHY
The Book of Parlour Games, pg. 3.
The Book of Parlour Games, pg. 3.
The Sociable, pg. iii.
The Sociable, pg. iii.
The Sociable, pg. iii.
The Fashionable Dancer’s Casket, pg. 132
According to The Sociable, Tableaux Vivants were deemed to be the most refined recreations in which a mixed party can indulge.
Complete Manual of Games of Society, pg. 141.
The Book of Parlour Games, pg. 137.
The Book of Parlour Games, pg. 24.
The Sociable, pg. 182
Peterson’s Magazine, November 1861, pg. 399
-By Karen Duffy